Dear God, It's Me, Lloyd
by SugarAddiction
Summary: Some say all dreams have premonitions, but Lloyd can't seem to wrap his head around the nightmare that's been haunting him. He finds comfort in knowing he isn't the only one awake at night. Shounen Ai, Fluff I suppose


I disclaim all.

Boy love. :)

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When he looked at me, I felt pained.

His narrow, ice blue eyes shot through me. Never has such a force taken the breathe out of me. I felt dizzy.  
He said not a word, but looked at me with so many emotions, I felt so… overwhelmed.

There was everything in his eyes—his hopes, his dreams, sadness, confusion, happiness, intelligence, beauty.  
Everything but… love, which you'd think would be in everyone's eyes.

He turned away, and I felt like screaming. Screaming for him to stop. Screaming until I cried, and for once in my life, I felt helpless.  
I don't know why I wanted him to stay so bad, but at that moment, I needed him, and that's all I knew.

My mouth went dry. I couldn't speak a word. Why?

'_D…don't..! Co….me……back…'_

I tried so hard. I felt like breaking down so bad. My head was spinning. I felt like throwing up. I was close to tears as I watched him walk away.

Then, I woke up.

I jolted upright in my bed, my eyes wide as saucers, in a cold sweat. I felt the need to say something, anything, just to make sure it was all a dream and I could speak again.

I looked around the room. Zelos was in the bed next to me sleeping. The bed on my other side was empty, but had been used. I took a moment to calm down and recollect my thoughts.  
Another Nightmare.  
Ending at the same place.  
Starting with the same person.  
Lasting for 5 dream minutes but 5 reality hours.  
The same thing, over, and over, and over….and over.  
What the hell? I can't seem to fathom why this keeps happening. The same thing over and over and over, the same dream, has been plaguing me for ages! It must mean something. It has to.

Can't deal with this right now.  
My stomach was growling like crazy. Nothing new, so as usual, I took the long treck silently downstairs to the hotel kitchen, as I'd been doing for the past three months. Of course, being part of the "Group of Regeneration" has its perks, meaning 24-hour access to the kitchen.

I made into the pitch-dark room safely somehow, and flicked on the lights. I made my way through to hanging cutlery and dishes and immediately headed for the refrigerator, which was HUGE and stocked with any food you could imagine.  
As I was rummaging through the fridge, I heard a noise. Normally, in a kitchen, you'd hear something spooky like the pots clanging when no one's there, and you jolt up but end up banging your head on the roof of the fridge, just to find no one there. Kind of like in those black and white horror movies.  
But this was just a little scratching type of noise, like an itching or material rubbing together.  
So I looked up, and of course, saw nothing.  
I continued my binge-fest when I heard it again.  
Nothing.  
I picked what I wanted and sat down. I was half way through my one-man buffet when I heard it again.

"Okay what the hell! Who—WHAAA!!"

I swear, I had jumped thirteen feet in the air.

It was Genis.

He was standing in the doorway of the kitchen, clad in his green pinstripe pyjamas with a curious look on his face.

"Oh god, you scared me shitless." I panted, clutching my chest with a mustard-covered hand.

"Well that's not my fault. I was here first. You walked right past me."

I shiver ran up my spine at the thought of walking right past someone, not being able to see anything but a sharp-eyed figure sitting in a chair, watching me silently in the darkness as I obliviously walked by.

"Well you could've said something."

"Yes, but I didn't. _You_ could've been more aware of what was around you."

"Ahh, whatever." I said, waving a hand downward. I had decided to drop the conversation and return to my glorious and well-needed food.

Genis sat down across from me.

"…so, why are you up?" I managed to spit our between bites. Yeah, I had terrible manners, but hey, if there's no Raine, there are no enforced rules.

"I… couldn't sleep." He shrugged the question off.

He looked rather gloomy. I mean, for Genis, he looked downright depressed.

Not only me, but Genis as well had recently been up and wandering about at night. The only thing is, I do normal stuff: read, eat, listen to music, eat, plan, eat, draw, eat, write, eat…

He doesn't.

It's actually a bit… disturbing.  
Now, I know he's not possessed, but… I think he's possessed.

Don't get me wrong, I don't walk in on him eating human flesh or anything, but he doesn't exactly… sleep. At all.  
I often find him sitting on the roof, doing nothing, or sitting in a chair in the dark, doing nothing again. Weirdest of all, I sometimes find him sitting in the middle of the hallway, in the dark, once again doing nothing.  
I'm more concerned than scared really, it's a bit unlike him. I tried to throw it in a conversation I once had with Raine, but she wants to brush all his problems off as puberty, which he'd long started. He doesn't even have a bad dream like I do. He's not even _trying_ to sleep.  
It's weird.

"Bad dream?"

"..Yeah."

Liar.

We sat in silence the rest of the night, and once done eating, retired to bed.

-----------------------------------

GOD.

HEY THERE, IT'S LLOYD IRVING.  
I'VE GOT THE CHILLS AFTER TONIGHT. GENIS WAS ALL GLOOMY, AND IT MADE ME A LITTLE UPSET. PLEASE, WHY IS HE SAD? I WANT HIM TO BE HAPPY, LIKE ME! I DON'T LIKE IT WHEN HE'S SAD, BECAUSE THEN I'M SAD TOO.  
I WANT HIM TO BE NORMAL AND SLEEP AGAIN, AND I WANT TO SLEEP NORMALLY AGAIN. I WANT TO BE HERE FOR HIM AS LONG AS HE NEEDS. HOW COME WE CAN'T SLEEP ANYMORE? HOW CAN I FIX THIS? PLEASE TELL ME. YOU CAN CALL ME. I DON'T HAVE A CELL PHONE, BUT SHEENA DOES. ONLY, WHEN I ASKED HER, SHE SAID IT WAS "1-800-GO-2-HELL". LAST TIME I ASKED HER, SHE SAID "1-905-YOU-WISH".  
SO YOU CAN CALL EITHER, AND ASK FOR LLOYD. OKAY?

THANKS, L.

-----------------------------------

The next night was the same. I had the dream:

His beautiful bright eyes stared at me, telling their story. Yelling, screaming, telling me so many things, yet his face remained expressionless.  
I tried to tell him to wait, as I had so many times before.  
I struggled to move, to run after him as he walked away, but all I cold do was watched. It seems every couple times I have this dream, I get a little further into it. I can't decide if I actually wanted to.  
The first few times, it just ended at him walking away.  
Then, it ended at his finally stopping at a long distance and looking ahead.  
After that, once he'd stop, he'd appear to shake and drop to his knees.  
Then, he'd cry.

This time, he'd reach the end of his trail, drop, and sob until my heart shattered. I felt incredibly guilty, for this unknown reason. It was such a foreign feeling, to feel and incredible amount of guilt for something you didn't do. He'd sit there and cry till his heart's content, and it was as if he knew in my dream that my heart was being crushed. He knew how I felt.  
And it was actually spooky.  
He'd stop immediately, and begin to turn his head, that's when I wake up.

This time, I stayed lying down, hiding underneath my blankets. I was facing Genis' empty bed, but I knew Zelos behind me was out like a light.

"Pssst…..Zelos…?"

I yell-whispered, which is the loudest way to scream without being loud. I was honestly scared enough of my nightmare to wake him just for comfort.

"Psst..! Zelos!"

"…Zelos..?!"

"ZELOS?!"

Man, that guy sleeps like a piece of meat. He didn't budge. The most I got out of the rock he is was a snort. All I could think about was him turning his head backwards to look back at me with demonic eyes.  
It scared me, to imagine what he'd look like.

I dozed off again, and ended up slightly screaming and jolting upward again.

"….whaaa..? Lloyd? …What's the matter..?" Was Zelos' sleepy reaction.

I never replied. I sat there, drowning in fear and sweat.  
I'd decided to be brave enough to go downstairs again.

I went to the kitchen, and there, sitting at the table was Genis.

"I knew you'd be up again."

"I… well, I had a nightmare."

"I know."

"You heard?"

"Lloyd, the whole city heard." He said matter-of-factly.

"Well, that's what you think. You only heard because you've got extreme hearing." I said, poking my ears to mock his elven trait.

It was the first time I'd seen a smile from Genis in what seemed like forever to me. The whole world knew Genis' was smiling, because when he smiles, the earth stops spinning. At least, that's what I think. I know other people think it, too. He has the most radient smile, and it seems to last a lifetime.

I managed to get some life out of him that night. I think, all he needed was to stay up all night, catching up with a friend.

-----------------------------------

GOD.

IT'S ME AGAIN, LLOYD.  
I WAS WONDERING, WHAT IS WITH THIS DREAM I'VE BEEN HAVING? AND WHY CAN'T GENIS STILL SLEEP? IS HE GOING THROUGH SOME SORT OF PHASE LIKE COLETTE?  
MY DREAM IS BOTHERING ME A LOT, AND I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD PLEASE TAKE IT AWAY FOR ME. I DON'T THINK I NEED IT IF I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT… RIGHT?

OH, AND IF YOU COULD, PLEASE HELP GENIS BE HAPPY AGAIN. I THINK HIS SMILE IS BROKEN.

THANK YOU, L.

-----------------------------------

Third night, same dream, same ending.  
I ended up doing the exact same thing, staying up with Genis 'till sunrise.

Jeez, I wish I looked like him sometimes.  
Yeah, sure, he's an _elf boy_, which is why people who discriminate don't ever say, "Hey, look at that guy! He's attractive, I would like to date him."  
But that doesn't mean no one's thought it, right?  
I hear people whispering about how beautiful he is all the time, we all have, it's just we've never told him. If anyone ever admitted to liking a half elf, they're obviously a goner in today's society. Sheena is always reassuring poor Genis that there's someone out there for him, and she tells us he'll grow up to be a total babe.  
I bet she really just wishes he were closer to her age, like a lot of other girls do. Personally, I think if he _weren't_so unattainable, he'd be a lady-killer in no time. Well that's what Zelos would say, on a less egotistical Twirp-hating level. Zelos never has any good comments about anyone but himself, but we still think he secretly likes Genis.

Me, on the other hand, am totally honest of what I think about other people, and Genis is one of the few people constantly on my mind.  
Not because he's attractive.  
Not because he's smart.  
Not because he's funny, cool, sweet, sensitive, cute.  
Because he's my best friend in the entire world, and I don't have much family, so he's all I have. Not that I'm complaining.

If I were a girl, I'd swoon over him too.

….Jeez, I sound…like I love him.

Well, I do! But not like… that..!

………do I?

-----------------------------------

GOD.

IT'S ME, LLOYD. HEY GOD, DOES BOY-BOY LOVE COUNT AS TRUE LOVE? I MEAN, I'M COOL WITH IT, BUT… IS IT POSSIBLE TO ACTUALLY LOVE SOMEONE YOU'RE SO CLOSE TO? OH, AND THE FACT THAT, YA KNOW, HE'S A GUY. I CAN'T FIGURE THIS OUT; THE DREAM OR MY FEELINGS. HELP!  
SOS  
IF I'M MEANT TO FIGURE THIS OUT, IF I'M MEANT TO BE HERE, AND IF I'M MEANT TO LOVE AT ALL, GIVE ME A SIGN…!

-----------------------------------

…_**.The next night…. **_

Same thing. Same dream. Same ending. Same kitchen. Same person.

…yep.  
I think… I have a crush.

I have to admit, it was awkward and slightly uncomfortable to sit with him alone at night.  
Why?  
Because _he's_ the guy in my dream.  
The one with the stunning eyes, and no expressions, walking away from me, solemnly sobbing his eyes out.  
He's the one that scaring me…and at the same time, the one I think I love.

We ended up sneaking our way back upstairs at about 3:00 am, pretending we were sleeping all along. This was my chance to clarify to myself if I really _did_ have any feelings for him.  
So, I made up an excuse to sleep with him.  
Not like _that_! Get your mind OUT OF THE GUTTER!  
Literally sleeping. Just for awhile.  
I told him I was still a bit scared to sleep alone, so he agreed to snuggle up with me for the remainder of the night. I have to say, that was such a great night. He melted into this ball of warmth, purring against me. He was sound asleep, but I wasn't, and for once, it wasn't because of the dream. I had this throbbing going on 'down there' and felt unusually squeamish next to him.  
He was… even beautiful in his sleep.  
A.W.K.W.A.R.D.

-----------------------------------

GOD.

IT'S ME, LLOYD. YA KNOW,THE LOVERBOY. YEAH, THAT'S ME.  
I GOT YOU'RE SIGN. I GET IT. GENIS IS MY SIGN.  
BUT... WHY'D YOU SEND ME AN ANGEL?  
HE NEEDS TO BE WITH YOU, SO HE CAN EARN HIS WINGS AND FLY! HE'LL BE LONELY DOWN HERE…  
OHHHHHH, I GET IT! AM I SUPPOSED TO KEEP HIM COMPANY? …AHH… M'KAY THEN. I PROMISE TO MAKE HIM HAPPY. 'SIDES, I LOVE HIS SMILE. JEEZ, YOU SENT ME A REAL PRETTY ANGEL…  
TELL YOU WHAT: I'LL MAKE A DEAL.  
IF I'M A GOOD BOY FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR, NO BONERS, NO MASTRUBATION, NO WET DREAMS, THEN YOU WILL GIVE ME GENIS FOR CHRISTMAS. HOW 'BOUT THAT??

THANKS, L.

-----------------------------------

The next day was weird for me for some reason. I found myself constantly blushing around Genis. It's not even like he _knows_ he makes me squirm! I can't imagine how bad it would be if he did. I wouldn't be able to even look in his direction because he would know I like him like that. I can't honestly say we have some sort of scandalous secret relationship between us goin' on, but it still makes me feel…amazing. _He_ makes me feel amazing.

He tripped, I caught him, bridal style. I blushed and nervously laughed, setting him down promptly after taking the opportunity to realized I had grabbed his ass.

He cast a spell to protect me during battle. He beamed at me, I thanked him and blushed, throwing him a suggestive smirk. His cheeks reddened and he looked away.

While I was off in la-la-land, daydreaming, he made a comment to someone else and look at me.

"Right Lloyd?" He smiled sweetly.  
Oh, I loved that.

"…ah, right!" I smiled back.

All day, these things he did, the smallest of gestures, the tiniest giggle, made me giddy.  
He blushed—I blushed.  
He laughed—I laughed.  
He smiled—I smiled.  
Everything he does, I find infectious. He makes me happy. He still does.  
All I wanted to do was what he wanted to do; to be with him, doing what I do best: adoring him.

…_**During that Night…**_

"So, tell me about this nightmare of yours, Lloyd."

"Well…. Wait, why?"

"I dunno. I'm curious. You haven't been so disturbed by a single dream since you were six. Remember?"

"Oh yeah! The Gremlins, and the closet..!"

"Yeah, and you wouldn't sleep until you knew I was there, safe, beside you. You kept waking me up, telling me something in there moved. You said it was a Gremlin."

"Heh, yeah. Sorry about that. Eheheh…"

"Hahaha It's okay. So, tell me about this horrible thing that's been irritating you so much."

At this point, I was scared to say anything. What to say?

_"Oh yeah you scare the living shit out of me and I'm scared you're gonna leave me and turn around possessed by demons but I love you and even though I dream fucked up things about you that's okay cuz I wanna make love to you anyway."_

Whoo, I can see how that's gonna work out:  
Genis: _-slap- YOU WISH, SICKO!  
-stomps away mumbling- "….bastard!"_

Me: "Wait!! What did I say?!"

I came back to my senses in time to notice his big, bubbly blue eyes staring at me, waiting for me to continue. I concentrated on his pointed ears perking up as I spoke.

"Ah…well, you see, I've been having this dream where there's this guy, and he's looks at me and then turns to walk away. I can't move, but I try to stop him. The nothing around but white around us…" He's staring at me intently, I can see out of my peripheral vision. He's such a sight, so doll-like…

"He finally stops far away, drops to his knees and cries. I keep waking up at this point where he's turning to look at me one more time. It's bothering me because…"

"…his eyes keep burning in you're mind?"

I nodded in agreement. I looked at him for what seemed to be forever. He looked deeply in my eyes, as if trying to find something.

"And.. you know this person?"

"Yes."

"…And all you can think about is him, and that stare."

"Yeah. Uh.. how'd you know?"

"Just a guess. A feeling, kind of."

"What do you think it means?"

"Dreams don't always have to mean something. Sometimes they do, mind you, but not always. It might be psychological issues. Is something bothering you in your life right now? Is there something you can't stop thinking about?"

"No…"

Well, that was a lie. That was a huge lie.

HE'S what I've been thinking about. For the past six months, I've been inwardly arguing with myself over my feelings for my companions, and I'm stuck on him. For the past three of those six months, my body language has begun to react to my thoughts. I'll convince myself I don't _like_ like him, then I'll turn around to face him, and turn to mush again.

"Maybe it's just the pressures of saving the two worlds, ya know?"

"Yeah."

He gave me a reassuring smile.  
The world doesn't matter when I'm with him. Nothing does.

-----------------------------------

GOD.

THIS IS LLOYD. AGAIN.  
…CAN HE GET ANY MORE TEMPTING?? _WHY_ MUST YOU TORTURE ME THIS WAY?! HE'S MEANT FOR ME… GOD, CAN YOU PLEASE MAKE ME AS AMAZING AS HIM SO HE'LL LOVE ME? PLEASE?  
ALL I WANT IS TO HOLD HIM. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?  
FOR THE SAKE OF KITTENS, FOR THE LOVE OF GAY LOVE, FOR THE SAKE OF INTERSPIECES RELATIONSHIPS, WHY IS HE SO GORGEOUS AND I'M SO NOT?  
WHY IS HE SO OUT OF MY LEAGUE?  
ANSWER ME THAT!

-----------------------------------

What a sweetheart.  
Oh, what a smile. You could kick a kitten then look at his smile and melt.  
Man, he's constantly got me off.

Yeah sure, I adore the little things he does all the time, but when I'm really into him, there are way more things to rave about.

It think what turns me on the most when I'm a little 'kinky' is simply checking him out. Everyone has a dangerous side, and we all know Genis does for sure.  
When I look at his body, my eyes linger on his gentle curve and I get lost in this image of him with this naughty smile, just drawing me in. He can be really seductive without even trying, or maybe I'm just really messed in the head. From some of the things I've heard him say, seen him do and react to, I know for sure that he's definitely not just a pretty face. He's kind of self-conscious, and prefers to drown in other people than drawing attention to himself. Why, I do not know.

He has a mix of aristocratic beauty and mystery in him, and makes people stop, watch and whisper about him. It makes me and some of the others wonder what his parents must've looked like, because Raine is really beautiful too. They both are.  
The hint of human is there, but it can easily be mistaken for pure elven beauty. That's what he is.  
Raine, who actually knew her parents for ten years, says he looks more elven that we know. She says he was a big mystery to the village they were born in, and she did not understand why at the time, but he was talked about a lot. She tells us tales of the places they've been for three years before they came to Iselia, and mentions her family in between.

We were surprised that this didn't bother Genis. To talk about your lost family would make you depressed, right? I know that talking about mine does.  
He's completely cool with it. In a way, he's really optimistic.  
He tells us he doesn't bother to miss something he never knew.  
He can be really wise sometimes. It may not sound like it, but to watch him during such a personal conversation is intriguing.

I think… I might actually confess to loving him.

When the times right, I'll tell him.

-----------------------------------

GOD.

IT'S ME AGAIN, LLOYD.  
IF YOU HEAR ME, PLEASE MAKE GENIS FALL IN LOVE WITH ME. MAKE HIM WANT TO MAKE LOVE TO ME. ON THE FLOOR, ON THE BED, AGAINST A WALL, I DON'T CARE, JUST PLEAAASE!! MAKE HIM WANT ME AS BAD AS I WANT HIM.  
…OR GIVE ME A VAGINA. THAT'D BE OKAY TOO,  
SINCE HE DIGS CHICKS.

-----------------------------------

I find myself desperate now. Perhaps a little more horny, desiring him, lustful as the desperation increases, but needy nonetheless. Desperate to tell him, and have him even reject me, just so he knows why I stare at him and gawk, drool hanging from my mouth in full awe.

I don't think I can take this much longer. Last night I told him that'd no matter what, I'd try my best to sleep, without coming downstairs.  
And I intend to keep my promise to myself, as much as I wanna see Genis again. It's crazy, this lovesick thing, because I still wanna be with him even though I see him 24/7 every day.  
So tonight, I'm gonna sleep.

'_I sat there, staring into his eyes, him, looking back at me. This time, it was different.'_

He looked… happy. A bit. It wasn't a clear expression, like a smile, but I could tell. It was like, a vibe.

'_White all around me, and me, not able to move. He slowly turned away, walking forward. Again, it was…different.'_

He didn't walk as far away from me. He walked about thirteen feet away from me this time.

'_He stopped, for only a moment, only to fall to his knees as he'd done so many times before. Different.'_

This time, he didn't cry. He stopped, his baby-blue tinted hair I could tell was fall in his face as he hung his head. He never even shed a tear as he fell to his knees. I got this feeling that he was impatient of something.  
Me?  
Maybe.

'_He slowly turned his his head, to look at me when…'_

I woke up. Though, not so violently this time. I simply opened my eyes to Genis' empty bed once again. I slowly sat up, stretching. I felt curious, not fearful, now to know what happens next.

I shrugged it off as I got up out of my bed. I glanced at the clock as I grabbed a sweater from my belongings. It was 1:11 am.  
I knocked on the wooden end table as I stepped out the doorway out onto the balcony. It wasn't too cold, but chilly enough to wrap up in a fuzzy blanket.

If I wasn't awake, I knew Genis wouldn't be in the kitchen. He wouldn't be downstairs at all.  
He'd be on the roof.

I grabbed hold of the ladder covered in vines and began to climb. How he got up there, I don't know.

I reached the top and pulled myself up. I brushed myself off and looked up, just for my eyes to meet at Genis' icy blue ones.

"Well, hello there." He smiled gracefully.

"Hey to you too." I let a smile creep up on my face as well.

He helped me all the way up to the peak beside him and we sat there, overlooking the treetops of the forest surrounding the hotel.

"I thought you were going to try and sleep tonight."

"I did. I woke up though again."

"Oh? I didn't hear you scream." He said evilly.

"Ha ha. Funny. It wasn't so scary this time. Actually, it was different." I replied, not making eye contact, but instead, gazing out over the forest.

"How so? Do tell, Obi Wan." He said with genuine interest.

"This time, he was…like, happyish. He didn't cry er anything, but It ended at the same spot. I'm actually kinda eager to know what might happen next. It's like, a movie er something."

"Huh. Maybe it's has some sort of connection to what's happening in your real life."

I considered the thought. Maybe it's like me conscience or whatever getting happier because…. I'm in love.  
Maybe _I'm_ happier because I'm in love. Because I'm figuring this out.

We sat in silence, every once in a while, glancing at each other.

Maybe this was the time. The time to tell Genis I loved him.

I..wanted to. I wanted to pour my heart out to him, telling him that he'll never be alone again, that I wanted him and that no matter what, I'll catch him when he falls. I wanted to confess this unconditional love I had for him, swing him back in my arms and kiss him until he was dizzy. I wanted to make him moan until he couldn't see straight, make him beg for love, and to make it. I wanted to give my heart to him, and if I could, I'd wrap it in a box and send it to him.

"Ge..nis." I half-spoke under my breath.

"Yeah?" He looked at me, having heard that perfectly. Damn elves.

"I-I think I'm in love."

"Hmm?" He tilted his head questioningly.

I looked at him, a small smile gracing my lips. He looked back at me with pure, cute and cuddly confusion.

"What? With who?" He ginned, eager to know. "Colette's going to have a field day when you tell her! Ahaa!"

"Eheh… no no…" I looked at my twiddling thumbs, embarassed.  
He gazed back, a little shocked. I guess it was to be expected. He waited patiently for my answer.

I took a moment to decide what to say. I should've thought this out earlier. I rested my chin in the palm of my hand, and looked off into the distance. He poked his hand in front of my face and waved it like I was.. well, lovesick. He softly let his head fall to the side, as if to prod me to continue.

"You."

I gathered up the courage within myself to look him in the eye, and my smile grew a little wider. The look of shock mixed with his blush was a hairline away from being edible, it was that appealing. He was flustered and I was smitten.

'You look so cute right now.'  
I thought about saying that out loud, but the last thing I needed was to scare him.

"Y-you.. really? Like… _for sure_, for sure? Or are you just kidding around with me to make me smile..?" He looked a little defensive at the moment, perhaps of the thought of me simply toying with his feelings.

"Yeah.. for sure. And a smile would be nice too."

His lips twitched a little at the corner from thought of whether or not he should react at all. He ended up smiling back at me shyly.

I turned around and crossed my legs to face him, again, resting my chin in the palm of my hand. I smiled lovingly, narrowed my eyes and gazed at him like I secretly had been for the longest time. My eyes were locked on him, as he blushed deeper and deeper, looking all around, avoiding my gaze.  
He finally gave the confidence to look me in the eye.

"You're so shy."

He looked up at me dreamily, and smiled.  
I never expected him to kiss me. But he did.  
He moved in, placed one hand on my shoulder and one on the side of my face. I've never felt so overwhelmed but such a simple gesture in my entire life.  
He wasn't a great kisser. He wasn't good kisser. He wasn't even an ok kisser. He was a 'WOW' kisser, and lemme tell you, I wouldn't be able to walk straight for a long time afterward.

And you know what? It wasn't even a big kiss. No tongue or nothing.

We parted and he looked into my eyes. Nothing was said, but so much was heard. All I saw was this intoxicating mixture of love and passion, something I've wanted to see in his eyes for so long.

The moment only lasted only a couple seconds in reality, but forever in la-la-and, where I was currently was. He kissed me again, and seemed to have left it up to me to add the sauce to the dish, so I took the invitation.

I ran my tongue smoothly along his bottom lip, earning a small moan from him. He parted his lips slightly, and I took the opportunity to slide my tongue in. Or, you know, jam it in. Whatever works. He moaned a lot deeper this time. I wrapped my arms around his slender waist and he pulled me in closer.

We ended up heading back to our room, and the kisses got more passionate along the way. We ended up sleeping together, and I finally got to hold him. We never went all the way, but it was a sensual night, and we eventually would another night. We never had any intentions of hiding our new love from the others, but we never actually said anything. I think they got the hint after I came downstairs the next morning and gave Genis a good morning snogg.

That night I confessed my love for him was the night I slept peacefully. My dream finally had an ending; He turned around slowly, as I watched closely, both excited and fearing what was to happen next. It wasn't what I expected at all. He was smiling at me. A loving, gentle smile. He came back and helped me up. We ended up walking away together.

-----------------------------------

GOD.

THANKS.

-----------------------------------

I think I get my dream now.  
I think I figured out the meaning behind it. It was part psychological on the part that was confused about my feelings about Genis, and part meaning because he was there the entire time. He knew all along about the dream, because he was in it.  
The reason was that I needed to figure out my feelings for him sooner or later, and that he was upset without me, as I was without him.

We both found love, and I knew he was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

_And as they say, the rest is history. (:_


End file.
